At 7,000 words, The Visitors is a flawless work of short erotic fiction. Erotica writers: take note!
What Drew Me In
As I mentioned in a recent article, I’m a science fiction fan, and ever on the search fo good sci-fi erotica. Unfortunately, a lot of self-published erotica, and even some published traditionally, is often less than stellar. Still, I was ready to put The Visitors to the test.
When I spotted The Visitors, I was excited to see an erotica book cover that wasn’t wrought with obscenity. My editorial brain took that as a good sign. I like smut as much as the next guy/gal/other, but I vastly prefer a tastefully enticing cover to the lewd caricature amalgamations which plague the romance and erotica genres.
Setting the Scene
Aliens have arrived on earth, and the petite Marine, Amelia Dryers, a.k.a. Mia, has been assigned to engage in some diplomatic relations with the visitors. Her mission: to live among them in one of their family units for three years. Enticed by the increase in pay, and with no real familial obligations back on earth, she accepts.
What I Loved About It
First of all, this story is nearly error-free! I found one spelling mistake and a single quotation mark that I believe was meant to be italicized. And that’s it!
Second, the story is told flawlessly. Mia’s character is fully developed, the scene is masterfully set, and the plot unfolds in a truly captivating way. By the time the erotica arrives, you’re so immersed in the story that you truly feel you’re taking part.
Third, The Visitors is blessedly free of adjective-stuffing!
What is adjective-stuffing, you ask? It’s my own made-up term for what erotica writers do to stretch out their sex scenes, presumably because they think it makes the scene better. What is really does is distract the reader from the story, which the writer should be able to tell in a succinct fashion.
Let me give you an example.
Instead of writing, “He placed his hand gently on her hip, sending shivers through her body,” your average erotica author might write, “The hot, sexy, hard-bodied man placed his strong, calloused hand on her milky-white hip, sending delicious shivers rippling through her young, nubile body.”
This type of hyper-description is fine now and again, but a story that’s 75% adjectives is basically unreadable.
The Visitors has none of that nonsense! It’s all story, and when the sex arrives, you’ll find yourself relishing every word; a rare accomplishment among the ostentatious stories so common within the genre.
What Could Have Been Better
Absolutely nothing could have been better! That said, in an early scene, when the young Marine is conversing with her superior officer, I noticed a distinct lack of the word ‘sir’ in the dialogue. Having spent some time in the military, I found this curious. But who knows; maybe at the time The Visitors takes place, such gender-specific addresses are defunct.
Anastasia’s Parlor Rating – The Visitors
I give Dominick R. Chance’s The Visitors, Part 1, five stars, because it’s flawless. Not only does it succeed at telling an erotic story, it does so masterfully. I’d give it six stars if I had the option.
If you’re an aspiring erotica writer, or a seasoned veteran who’s looking to fine-tune their writing style, read The Visitors.
You can be sure I’ll be reading the next part in the series.